Father Figure

6/25/23

I grew up with a family-conscious Dad who did his utmost to provide us with a safe, stable, and goodly upbringing. He always made sure we were respectful, and honored our elders, and worked hard, and said “thank you” when it was needed. Those are divine lessons that were specialized for him to teach us. He had 2 daughters before Regina (twin sister) and I were born, and he has always loved us all daughters the same, yet we all know we have our own places in his heart, too. When I was 18, my Dad made the hard decision to let us go to college out of state, and out of even family-comfort zones. But it was a good thing.

My World Got Rocked!

There I was met with a spiritual guide that led me to the Lord by way of the born-again experience, and that introduction to following Jesus, seeing God’s life in him (Jim and Melissa Nesbit) and his family, transformed my view of Christianity, Christian living, and what a life of following Christ might look like. I needed such a shocker as that to my system because I had had as much church as any minister’s kid, or PK (pastor’s kid) ever did! Every time there was something to do at church while we were growing up, my Dad and Mom made sure that we were there. We had youth quests, bible quiz, talent quest (talent shows), youth group, choir practice, prayer meeting, kids activites like specialized youth nights, and not only did we go to our bible schools at Culbreth, we also would go to several different church’s Vacation Bible School’s programs, and I still cherish those Bible School memories I had with Regina to this day. We also had youth camp, singing as teens at the nursing home, singing carols with the youth at Christmas, doing multiple trips to the that same nursing home again for different holiday events. We had “hallelujah nights!” instead of Halloween. We had hunger drives (where we would fast for 24 hours), and the money would be sent to another location for kids literally in hunger. We had lock-ins and rock-a-thons. Additionally, Bible Sunday Schools, Missionettes, various walk-through plays of Bible re-enactment stories, activities at Falcon Children’s Home with the children there, and were active with helping at puppet shows, revival meetings, camp meetings, serving in canteen snack during youth camps, which we also attended camp for ourselves. Also, there were trips to my Mom’s mom (Ma-Ma Ruth’s) church where Regina and I would sing together, on numerous occasions. The church was also active in Falcon Town Parades, and Falcon Town Day, with the Town of Falcon’s rich and well-to-do history, itself. Occasionally, we would also hand out flyers in town to families to get their children to come to church that normally would not. So, when I say that I had had “all the church” that a soul could have, I’m not saying it negatively or positively, necessarily, I’m stating the facts.

When I got to college, my twin Regina already knew she wanted to be a missionary or a minister for the church or something along that stream of thought, within our denomination. Her desire has always been and always will be to be in the center of God’s will. She has always worked hard and excelled in the things she does. Her conscience was more tender than mine growing up, and I would tell you that then, and I could still tell you that now. She even “spoke in tongues” (a supernatural gift seen in the days of the early formation of the church from Century 100AD – see 1 Corinthians 12 thru 14) when we were preteens and I remember going into the bathroom and thinking after the service that happened, and it just hit me that she was so much further along with the Lord and that I needed to accept that. Also, for years I could not gain assurance of faith, always feeling like I had to go the altar all the time. When I would ask adults about it, they would say “You just have to have faith”, but I was never sure though I always desired to be.

Though Regina knew what she wanted, I only knew I wanted to do “God’s will” in general, but it was a holy kind, so I should say I wanted to do the “father’s will”. And I was so indecisive about majors and beginnings at EC that my educational advisors looked at my previous grades and test scores and suggested I should major in mathematics. I was willing to do anything but that! But then I thought (a small glimmer of light in me, perhaps?) What if God could use that, especially if it’s something I don’t want to do? [I had remembered specifically saying to God in my mind during high school that I would do anything but teach, and do anything but study math!]. What a weird person I am! But it did end up working that way. I actually ended up absolutely loving it, though wondering all the while if I would encounter something I couldn’t tackle.

A New Life, A Regenerated Life From Above

Then the Spring of Freshman year 2005, I saw that there was going to be a couple’s speaking event where couples from the campus were going to talk about how God put them together. OF COURSE I wanted to go! I believe every young person would want to hear that(!), especially since college freshman are so vulnerable all walking around like talking hormone-machines! I remember heading to the couple’s speaking event, and thinking how cool it probably be to go to this thing. I didn’t realize that at that event, I would become totally enthralled with a couple there that was going to “knock my socks” off in their stories of their coming to Jesus individually and how He then specifically, prophetically, and dare I say, perfectly, led them to one another. God spoke to Jim in an audible voice one time at a waterfall, and asked him between 3 women, who he would want to marry. Also, Jim and Melissa kept running into each other on mission trips, random airplanes and more random airplanes. [Something else that also made them stand out was the way they dressed and presented themselves, which was extremely simple, conservative, and humble]. In regards to “hearing from God”, me growing up in a pentecostal environmental, like a charismatic church community that did believe in prophecy (even though I only remember hearing that word a handful of times), I did have a small grid of understanding about hearing from God in a general kind of way. I also had an aunt Katherine Lucas and another Lucas distant relative who both claimed that had heard God’s audible voice, and I believed them and marvelled at that, but for some reason I could not lay hold of the idea that God could talk prophetically to every believer, and desired. Nor did I realize the Lord could speak to thoughts, nor did I realize that Jesus could pierce me with a word from the Bible when my eyes became illuminated by childlike faith. Well, that was about to change. Jim (James) Nesbit and his wife Melissa, and their two boys were about as wild of family as I have ever met, and I knew several beloved missionary families. It’s funny that I term them in the missionary category immediately when really they had come to the Emmanuel College campus just to be upright professor, a stay-at-home wife with 2 young homeschooling boys, all trying to “to the very day serve God all good conscience” like Paul talks about in Acts. They were individually serving God as spirits, and that element of standing firm in their own individual faith, is what made them glow when they were together. Their mission was Jesus, their method was Jesus, and their timing was with the Spirit! They were not afraid to say so! The thing that they shared about that rocked my world that day, was the idea that they were not with a denomination, a church organization, a specific word like “charismatic”, “Protestant”, or “Church of the …..” group, but that they were simply people led by God, not tied to a group, not “apostle” or “Reverend sister this or that” but THEY WERE constantly talking about Jesus with so much joy that – no joke – it was like their face would shine. “Those who look to the Lord are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame” (Psalms 34:5). I saw them cry for the Lord, get persecuted for preachings in the “off-times”, wash feet for the Lord, share in their home and break bread, and I touched the life of Jesus with that family. I learned more about the body of Christ around the world, and I had always heard that people were suffering for Jesus around the world, but I came to see ideas like “House church” or “home meetings” or “unorchestrated meetings” where the praises of Jesus and testimonies and confessions of sins, and free tears would be shared, or prayer for one another’s physical healings, sometimes praying specifically against demons. I heard abut people that “prayed too much”, “lived lives of purity” and read books about what was happening to Christianity in the world right now. Some of those authors were Watchman Nee, Brother Lawrence, George Barna, Philip Yancey, Richard Foster, the “Matthew, Mark, Luke and John” of the Bible and all the books of the Bible fresh in my eyes. I also had prophetic dreams and was friends with a lady on campus who would not call herself a prophetess, but that is what she is!

Also, movies about saints that endured for Jesus really meant a lot to me, and were pivotal in my formation as a young “wet behind the ears” believer. To me, it was like I had been thirsty for so many years, and I’m in tears as I remember it, because such an eternal work was done, that I sometimes forget who I used to be, but THERE IS NO GOING BACK. I confess I’m totally bonkers for Jesus and I don’t see that ever stopping. I have touched the life of Jesus in many people’s influence my whole life, but these people met me when I was becoming an independent young adult, and their guidance changed the decisions for the rest of my life, including the type husband I should seek and marry, I might add! This blog WordPress prompted me to write about a “spiritual father”, and to this day and thru many a trial and storm I have already come with all my diverse family in the Lord, but this family has been with me through marriage, persecution, understood and misunderstood friendship problems, and they’re still walking with Jesus! I feel their prayers holding me up in the cracks and crevices of my life, and in the most crucial times that I need to get a hold of Jesus – somehow Jim and Melissa and family, they are there. I’m not as close to them as I’d like to be now, but I know they’re in God’s hands.

I want to say “thank you”, for risking their lives, their jobs, and their livelihoods to see that even a few people caught a hold of the good news of Jesus, but I now know best illustration of gratitude will be to live a life that honors their Lord, and the people they tried and suffered to represent in the body of Christ.